I’m Almost Ready for My Close-Up (Sleepy Thoughts on Video You Didn’t Demand)
Philipp Goedicke

Now Vista’s out. It’s great [1]. Or trash [2].
New Shuffles hit the floor [3-5].
But YouTube beckons with some cash [6].

Wake up, you’re on in four. [7]

Show off new products from all sides,
Tell others what you see [8-13].
If you made it, beam with pride [14].

Wake up, you’re on in three [15].

Or take some clips from other shows,
Like Bill Gates’ interviews [16, 17].
(But don’t expect some cash for those.)

Wake up, you’re on in two [18].

Post games [19, 20] or people playing games [21, 22],
Or ad-campaigns, undone [23],
Or weddings, now no longer lame [24].

Wake up, you’re on in one [25].

So pose in your Jack Bauer gear [26],
Take pictures in HD [27].
The censor’s ready [28], camera’s here.

“[BLEEP] off, don’t bother mii.” [29]

[1] A Copy of Windows Vista Ultimate and His Boy
[2] Six Good Reasons Not To Upgrade To Vista
[3] Omg! The Apple Store Is Down!
[4] Apple Poops Out Multicolored iPod Shuffles
[5] More Color iPod Shuffle Info
[6] YouTube Plans on Rewarding Uploaders
[7] Wake Up…WAAAKKKEEE UPPPP!
[8] Apple TV Goodness
[9] Belkin Wi-Fi Phone For Skype
[10] HTC Athena/Ameo/U1000 Or Whatever It’s Called Hands On
[11] Samsung NV7 OPS Quick Look
[12] Vista Aero: Linux Is Eating Your Lunch
[13] Collection of Strange Windows-Powered Devices
[14] Meet D.A.V.E., Our Friend From Seagate
[15] Puzzle Alarm Clock Wakes You Up, Pisses You Off
[16] CNN Calls Gates Out On Vista’s Design
[17] Bill Gates on The Daily Show Humping for Vista
[18] Clocky Is Now Shipping!
[19] BBC Tetris Documentary: Amazing
[20] Wii OS Video Hits The Net
[21] Uncomfortable Game Demo
[22] Anthrax Guitarist Can’t Play His Own Song In GH2
[23] ATHF Is the Bomb!
[24] Wedding Thriller: Caught On Tape
[25] LG SV260 Nags And Then Nags Some More
[26] Jack Bauer Gear at Uncrate
[27] Canon HV20: HD Camcorder
[28] Personal Censorship In The Works
[29] Lazy Wii Guy Shows You How It’s Done