Pigboat contest winner: Ryan
  • 4 Comments
by John Biggs on March 24, 2008


Using my secret aggregation method for picking winners, I chose Ryan as the winner of the nasty Geeks.com PMP. His sad, sad prize is on its merry way.

I guess I’m wanting this piece of total shit crap stool poop (to paraphrase Biggs’ March 18th review) more its dramatic destruction and an excuse to borrow some robots than to actually own and use it.
I will have borrowed 4 of these
from Boston Dynamics and tie a steel cable to each one and the other end of the cable to the Poop-pod (as we will now call the PMP in question)
Each BigDog robot will then be set out in separate direction, quartering the little thing into… quarters.
Oh wait, I forgot the nukes. Then I’ll nuke it and blame it on SkyNet.
This is actually how the whole Skynet thing will get started. All because someone had to make an extremely cheap crappy version of an iTouch and someone had to send one to CG to be reviewed, and they hated it and then create a contest to give it away and I wanted to win it.
Stick that in your time machine.

Comments rss icon

  • wow
    I’m speechless
    I feel so honored that CG thinks that i am the deserving owner of this total piece of shit
    Now why haven’t those BigDog Robots guys answered my email yet?
    I need to borrow at least 4 of them

    • …all i have to say is you better fuckin’ do it. i was gonna look so badass in my unlaced docs with an apple tat on my heart stompin’ the shit out of it (yeah, i’d post it for all to see). don’t let us down mofo…

      • Like i said, I emailed Boston Dynamic to borrow some Robots and I text messaged Kim Jong-il and asked to borrow one of those crappy nukes they have. I’m worried they have already loaned them all out to Syria.
        When I get it all together, I’ll video it, post it to youtube, and post a link, but you will probably already know because most of the world will be destroyed and robots will be in charge.

        • cool beans. you know, i hear nukes are relatively easy to get ahold of (just twitter @taliban and reference ‘the white devil’ and ‘praise abba? or something’ it’s yours)…

Leave Comment

Commenting Options

Enter your personal information to the left, or sign in with your Facebook account by clicking the button below.

Alternatively, you can create an avatar that will appear whenever you leave a comment on a Gravatar-enabled blog.

bugbugbug