My day with Bigfoot
- August 15th, 2008
- 45 Comments
The alarm goes off, and my daily routine begins. Out of bed, into the shower, wash, brush, dress. From there, it’s straight into the Crunchgear writer chatroom.
Greg K. has entered the room
Greg K. Good morning, party people.
Doug A. happy Bigfoot day, Greg
Crap. Today was the day of Bigfoot press conference. I wanted to use Qik to share the conference with the world, but I still hadn’t managed to track down anyone involved who could tell me what exactly I’d need to get in the door — or if I even could. It’s one of the few nasty parts of being a blogger - a small (but just big enough to be horribly annoying) chunk of people out there still don’t consider bloggers to be press. I dig up the e-mail address of Tom Biscardi (the main face of the whole Bigfoot fiasco), rocket off an email, then hop in the car and tear down the 101.
About 15 minutes into the drive, I get a response: “Tell them at the door Tom said it was o.k.” Jackpot! That M.I. A song from the Pineapple Express trailer is playing on the radio; I celebrate by cranking up the volume and doing all of the gunshot noises with appropriately matched hand gestures.
Four and a half hours, a nasty bout of surprise traffic, and a mad sprint through Palo Alto’s Cabana hotel later, I wind up in the press conference about 10 minutes late. I pop out my handset, cross my fingers, and start up QIK. No 3G. Not even a hint of edge. After relocating myself at least 5 times in hopes of finding reception (likely annoying the hell out of the entire back half of the audience), I lose hope. Users were treated with one half second of video before streaming (or even liveblogging) went out the door.
I glance around, considering one final relocation for the sake of reception. The audience was a mix of bloggers, younger guys writing for various school papers, some dude in a bigfoot suit, and a good number of traditional media folk who were making it quite obvious that they hated being there and wanted to get the hell out as soon as possible.
With everyone waiting to ask their pressing Bigfoot question, things teetered on the edge of chaos. There were at least a handful of times where questions were yelled over each other, resulting in a big blur of RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE with some higher-toned RABBLES mixed in. For the questions that were heard and fielded, answers were as ambiguous as you might expect. When was it found? No one remembered an exact date. What happened with the DNA testing? One test said human — the other said it was 96% possum. Did they have video of the live ones? Yeah, but they weren’t releasing it yet.
After about 30 minutes of questioning scrutiny, the audience got sick of waiting for what they really came for: “When will we see more evidence?”, came a voice from the back. To paraphrase the response: “When we’re done answering questions. Are you all done listening to us talk?” The crowd goes crazier than Doug Aamoth at a New Kids concert.
Tom takes one step toward the table where the photographic evidence was to be passed out, and the entire audience collectively decides to make an attempt at standing on the exact same spot in the room at once. There are no Excuse-Mes. No “Oh, sorry for stepping on your toe with my massive feet while wearing a backpack full of AV gear.” Just a crap ton of hot, tired journalists trying to get their hands on the goods without much regard.
Believers were in a state of wonderment as they oggled the shot of Bigfoot marching through the woods; skeptics wondered if it was just a still from Harry and the Hendersons. Overall, I don’t think anyone left the press conference feeling any different than they had when they entered.
dwalk51 (Who am I?)
3 months ago
ooohhhhhhhh. That sucks.
Brent M. (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I think bigfoots have electronic devices that make all cameras within several miles blurry.
What? (Who am I?)
3 months ago
It’s fake as a three dollar bill. It’s pretty incredible that two regular dudes can get the whole world in a tizzy.
John Kreuzer (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Guess I’ll just have to keep watching Harry and the Hendersons!
http://kreuzer33.wordpress.com/2008/08/16/bigfoot-press-conference-revealsnothing/
randy bishard (Who am I?)
3 months ago
“A nigger?” as Jack Nicholson said in “The Shining.”
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Devan (Who am I?)
3 months ago
You dumb and need to be punched in the mouth.
Devan (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Your dumb and need to be punched in the mouth.
Bohica (Who am I?)
3 months ago
It should be, “You’re dumb…”
johnnyquest (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Strike Two…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjT_oUDcjFg
ricky (Who am I?)
3 months ago
is it real or not?
Greg Kumparak (Who am I?)
3 months ago
My vote: Hell no.
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
How can you even ask that question? There should be a law. All doubters get life, or the chair… or the chair plus life! I’ve stopped asking whether it’s real, and I’ve resorted to wishing into realness. I think it may come to life if I wish hard enough.
SaSQuach (Who am I?)
3 months ago
How come the police hasn’t looked into this and confirm that it isn’t a dead person in a monkey suit? Also isn’t ther a public health risk for having something like that in a freezer for more than a month? Diseases? Maybe some the stench from the carcass made these “Bigfoot Hunters” delirious. These guys are just a waste of time, I have a “BIG FOOT” and I like to to kick both these morons butts with it for wasting our friggen time!
randy bishard (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Come on, think. These dudes happened to contact the biggest bigfoot con-artest around, who just so happens to have a movie called “Bigfoot Lives” (which he wants $25.00 a pop for and can’t sell) and a website that does advertising (which has gotten so many hits recently that the bandwidth couldn’t keep up). What will happen is this: 1)They will give ambiguous, tenuous details 2)They will provide DNA evidence that is inconclusive 3)The supposed bigfoot corpse will vanish in either a theft or a fire 4) They will get publicity and the profits of the movie and the website will go up exponentially for a short while. 5)They will be laughing all the way to the bank.
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Stop confusing me with the facts. My mind is made up.
Johnny Safe (Who am I?)
3 months ago
“Also isn’t ther a public health risk for having something like that in a freezer for more than a month? Diseases?”
Obviously you’ve never lived out in the country. It’s common practice to store dead animals in freezers until they get dressed or mounted.
Harlow Stephenson (Who am I?)
3 months ago
What do BIGFOOTS have the we do not? Maybe we are just too damn loud.
Harry (Who am I?)
3 months ago
In looking at the “closeup” of the teeth and tongue of this specimen, I can only conclude that this creature would have starved to death long before reaching its seven foot size due to poor dentition. The upper teeth should have a set of lower teeth opposed to it in order for the creature to be able to bite its food, a hallmark of all primates. The lower jaw and chin in the photograph seem nonexistent. All primates also share characteristic canines… which are missing in this photo. Please don’t expect me to believe the creature was using dentures made for a human mouth. As my wife pointed out, the creature must have gotten them from the one-hour place. When exactly was this specimen discovered? Around the first of April?
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
That’s a “tongue” blocking the lower jaw. That’s right. A long tongue sticking out. You know, because… well, that’s what a dead Bigfoot would look like, right? Don’t all dead things stick their tongues out like Gene Simmons?
Hippiechic (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Where’s Nessie?
ROBERT BRAUN (Who am I?)
3 months ago
i think the whole world is gone nuts with this crap on this big foot. may be he came up from hell who knows .
ROBERT BRAUN (Who am I?)
3 months ago
if you belive this crap i will sell you a bridge .
Ryan (Who am I?)
3 months ago
The Truth Is Out There
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
And it looks like a Sasquatch costume.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrG3yL1bmak
Imma Bigfoot (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Was he/she/it taken down by a Republican hitman when it was discovered he/she/it was the possible Vice Presidental candidate Obama was considering??? If he/she/it had lived and been selected for VP no doubt the Hillary crowd would have happily supported the Obama/Bigfoot ticket and McCain and ??? would have been trounced, eaten alive, buried and/or blown away! God, what history that would have made. Too bad…so sad.
Gary (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I think Bigfoot IS blurry. That’s the problem. It’s not the photographers fault. Bigfoot is blurry and that’s extra scary to me.
Gary (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I think Bigfoot IS blurry. That’s the problem. It’s not the photographers fault. Bigfoot is blurry and that’s extra scary to me.
Stan Schrade (Who am I?)
3 months ago
What the hell is that a picture of… looks like a hairy half duck half human corpse… has bigfoot really been found or are these guys cannibals with body parts on deep freeze…
alex (Who am I?)
3 months ago
hi im very interested in finding new species or uncovering mysteries like this one and email me and tell if bigfoot is real or not because i missed the news today.
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Bigfoot is very real. And he’s on ice in freezer in Georgia. Even if this looks like a total, complete, and unequivocal hoax, remember: don’t let the truth confuse or sway you.
Susie Q (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Can’t these guys find something better to do like find UFOs or something?
John (Who am I?)
3 months ago
O yeah out of no where Big foot comes into play! Great distraction from Bush starting World War 3! IMPEACH BUSH! Restore the Republic!
Maureen (Who am I?)
3 months ago
Well well well…….. in this day of skepical thinking and techology in every nook and cranny, you would think people wouldn’t buy into this hogwash, makes one wonder.
Personally, I would prefer if the Easter Bunny was real.
Amos (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I think I figured it out. They say that Bigfoot was dead when they found him. I believe he was so hot he climbed into the freezer while munching on a opossum got thirsty licked the ice on the inside of the freezer causing his tongue to get stuck then died because he couldn’t free himself. This explains why the tongue is extended.
Amos (Who am I?)
3 months ago
They should name him Flick from the movie A Christmas Story.
mandy (Who am I?)
3 months ago
all your bigfoot are belong to us.
Jason V (Who am I?)
3 months ago
No thats just the love child of randy bishard and a possum
LanceZ (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I bet the Sasquatch community is pissed. “Now everyone thinks we look like that $500 Deluxe Sasquatch Costume.”
Amos (Who am I?)
3 months ago
I just saw this guys brother at a trailer park on the north side of town.
jessica
3 months ago
I think this is a bunch of bull
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