Pardon my French, but this is the biggest hunk of shit I have ever seen in my life. It’s a short clip from the upcoming movie 2012, which stars John Cusack (as if I know who that is!). Here’s why I hate it with every fiber of my being.
1. The contrived husband-wife relationship. “Oh honey, you’re just being silly.” The wife instantly dismisses Cusack without listening to a word he has to say. Why not have a conversation, like adults, rather than just going, “That’s just my husband acting dumb again!”
2. Cusack’s driving skills are unbelievable. Like, I cannot believe them. Unless you’re Michael Schumacher or The Stig there’s no way you’re making those turns so effortlessly as THE WORLD IS LITERALLY FALLING APART ALL AROUND YOU. So unless Cusack plays a multi-time F1 champ I have a hard time believing he’s able to drive so damn perfectly.
3. That big, stupid donut that rolls across the road. God I hate that donut. Never mind that The Simpsons used that same exact gag like 10 years ago.
4. The whole airplane scene. Bite me, Hollywood. I’d actually like to talk to an aviation expert and ask him what happens in real life when you lift an airplane before you reach the correct speed.
5. Oh, and where are they flying to? If the whole word is falling apart, where are they flying to, and on a single tank of gas no less?
I’m embarrassed to be an American right now.
As a matter of fact, I want that scenario to happen now. I’d rather see the world destroyed than live in a world where people get paid millions upon millions of dollars to create that garbage, with all due respect to actual garbage.
*crickets*
Where is all that earth going? Is it just collapsing in some black whole abyss at the center of the earth?
*hole
With you 100%
Believe me, it is even more embarrassing living in Hollywood seeing shit like this, and knowing that some acquaintance of yours is probably proud to have worked on it!
Also, as long as we are picking apart the idiotic trailer, if they took off from LAX (and that looked like an LAX runway) then why are they flying back into downtown, instead of out over the ocean?
For that matter, what happened to the ocean? all this ground cracking open, in a city that isn’t much above sea level, and on the coast, you would think that there might be some water.
Wow, the hatred this trailer stirs up in me!
Oh, I hadn’t seen that whole clip. So Santa Monica airport. Why again are they flying into downtown?
What do you do in Hollywood? I’m just curious, since I think you’ve mentioned it before.
Maybe the only thing that could make this movie interesting would be if it were a true end of the world scenario. Like, all life on Earth is wiped out, and all the land is destroyed, etc. Force the audience to confront its own mortality. I hope to God it doesn’t end with Cusak and Co. miraculously surviving this cataclysm, and somehow saving America (and humanity?) in the process.
I used to do CG and 3D animation, but got sick of the Hollywood thing, and now am an artist, focusing mainly on photography and design. My wife still works for a big entertainment company doing web stuff though, and a lot of my friends are still in “the business.”
I am going to guess…they are not flying to the ocean because of a tidal wave. They are flying inland because the edge of the country in falling into the ocean and they are seeking land that might survive the tidal wave.
jump up jesus christ.
I do not know which is more offensive:
a) studios think we are this stupid
b) people are this stupid
America has sinned and this is our penance.
p.s. Xenu is coming!
… this will be the prequal to Water world…. were all gonna live on barges after 2012 i guess.
Barges wouldn’t be a bad idea, I’m sure you could save at least a few million with hydroponics and barges and use a solar distillery to purify the sea water for any necessities. Though there probably would be constant squalls if there was nothing but water (but I don’t know all that much about atmospheric science in a post 2012 apocalyptic world). I see this movie being like The Day After Tomorrow… a bunch of very unscientific sounding events portrayed as being a very scientific very possible future, but it does make me want to see Volcano again…
“Embarrassed to be American” is taking it a little far… love it or leave it, leave slandering it to the online euro hordes…
Freedom of speech is what being an American is all about. Even if it’s stating feeling embarrassed to be an American! So if being an American means you can say “I’m embarrassed to be an American because of this movie” …and you clearly hate him for expressing as much.. then why do YOU hate America?
+1
In fact I am really tired of people just throwing shit like that around, and you shouldn’t be doing it at all in my opinion. Not unless you really mean it, and in that case, like I said, farewell bud.
What gets me is Hollywood is simply getting ridiculously stupid now with computer graphics. I’d be willing to bet the trailer is petty much the whole film itself. A true end of the earth film should focus on what the people themselves might be thinking or doing.
Instead, we see little more here than just cheap campy typical Hollywood “WoW look what we can do with fake digital imagery” than any real character development or story plot. I love Sci-Fi but junk like this will appeal to 12 year old kids for about ten minutes before even they develop a major yawn factor (apologies to 12 year olds world wide).
I also enjoy the clear lack of respect or reverence for life, as literally thousands of people are dying and they’re cracking jokes about donuts.
newsflash baddies: it’s a movie
also, to the person asking where all the land is going. california is on a massive fault line. maybe you should look it up
newsflash Tim: it’s based on crap science
also, fault lines are fractures in the Earth’s surface, not subduction zones or voids. maybe you should look it up
WAT. A MOVIE NOT BASED IN REALITY?
THIS IS LUDICROUS
p.s. keanu reeves can’t really move like that, in case you weren’t aware
Wow, Canoe can’t move like that? Really??
The next thing you’ll tell us, Fail, is that 1) you do understand basic geology, or can at least look up plagiarized article snippets on Wikipedia, 2) didn’t have to repeat kindergarten until your were in your teens, and 3) were only pretending to be a brainless tool during your sad attempt at snarkiness toward the people wondering why the earth was opening up in the movie trailer.
Doesn’t excuse anything. 2012 end of the world due to Nibiru is pseudoscience. Anyway, there is a not-so-bad Silver Surfer’s story based on this theory.
Wow, looks like another contrived, cliched, Michael Bay POS.
Roland Emmerich: The poor man’s Michael Bay.
Anyone remember the original trailer?
Just the monk in the tower on the mountain… ringing the bell as a huge tidal wave came up and swept him away?
That was intriguing… I had high hopes for the movie.
Not after seeing this rubbish.
I guarantee that this movie is going to be nothing more than a 2 hour lecture on Global Warming… and John Cusak dodging a crumbling world… and the audience groaning.
Lots and lots of groaning.
OMG – I have to agree, what a piece of crap! Roland Emmerich is planning his sequel already “Independence Day, 2012″
I guess Roland has those nightmares of the LA sinkholes up his ass.
If i do end up watching this, I hope that 99% of the acting doesn’t end up being a bunch of people cowering and looking out the damn window. Yeah i’m with you on the driving, and if the world is falling, you do decide to go over downtown instead of the ocean, maybe it would make more sense to pull up? Airplanes don’t fly on a level plane 500 feet above the ground for the entire flight. I’m no pilot or anything but hell i’ve been on a plane before.
plus that limo was pretty damn fast and handles damn well for a stretched towncar.
And yet again… Another shit ‘end of the world’ movie that takes part with Americans.
I’m pretty sure no one wants to see another shit “end of the world” movie that focuses on, say, the people of Lichtenstein.
I’ve seen the ending. It ends with Cusack saying, “I have an idea,” and walking out with a boom box playing Peter Gabriel. He holds it towards the sky and the brimstone ceases instantly.
OMG! I couldn’t believe this when I saw it aired the other night. What a piece of crap. I think that’s the worst trailer for any film, like EVER!
I guess what struck me as odd was why fly through downtown, why not just fly over it all? But what do I know…
As far as I can see, the whole bunch of you so-called critics are just as terrible as the movie MIGHT be.
Because
1. No one has seen the ENTIRE movie just yet – so withhold your pitiful judgment
2. Just like around Microsoft products, there’s a lot of critics – but that ‘dumb’ company still sells a whole lot of their software and people actually do like it.
3. Could you possibly do a better job?
1) Considering the quality of the trailer, we’ve probably seen all of the good parts of the movie.
2) People can criticize all they want. I think that, in general, people have a good idea of how a movie is going to be from the trailer, and this looks pitiful.
3) Probably, yes. I mean, not with the special effects, but with a plotline that would make more sense than “OMG WE GOTTA GO!”
Hah, I thought I was the only one who felt that way, agreed with everything.
“I’m embarrassed to be an American right now.”
You are all Tools! It’s a movie people!!! Sure, all of us understand that there is probably some inaccuracy seen in the trailer, your just pointing out the obvious – wowie, your good…
Any WHY is anyone embarrassed to be an American just because there was a bad movie made? Come on, Hollywood makes about 10+ bad movies a year. I will never be proud to be an American!!! USA
oops, I will ALWAYS be proud to be an American!!! USA
“Hollywood makes about 10+ bad movies a year.”
LOLOLOLOL
That’s like saying:
“The Nazis killed about 100+ People in th Holocaust”
i’m gonna crack up when this movie turns out to be awesome….
I’m going to crack up as I watch this movie, it looks like it’ll be so awful it’ll become a comedy, and there are very few movies that reserve that right, The Mist is one of them (of course without reading the book I could predict everything in that movie, even the ending, which also made the movie hilarious).
Wow, you really hated the video! It was pretty funnny seeing you creeping out like that, seriously!
And wait, THAT trailer makes you be embarassed to be an American? Really?! With so many REAL reasons for that..
And don’t you watch sci-fi movies?! I mean, almost all of them, specially the end-of-the-world ones, are unlikely just like that.
You just porobably were stressed about something when you saw this…
it’s not much different from other american movies and shows.
Actually, I just hate the idiot Hollywood producers and studios who spend hundreds of millions of dollars and use the same story over and over without coming up with something at least remotely original. When you see a story about end of world and have a couple hundred million dollars or people to kill, I think producers like Roland Emmerich and a monkey could do the same job – Oh sorry, you do need to help the monkey type.
“Monkey Studios Movie plans:
Please send $200 million for END-OF-WORLD by
Earthquake – check
Fire – check
Aliens – check
Ice – check
Zombies – check
2012 – check
Ice tea – script still pending
2016 (Olympics) – script still pending
Budget
$100 million for digital effects
$20 million for actors unless we use South African unknowns, then $2 million
$20 million for catering and security
$12.00 for script and xeroxing
$60 million for monkey’s expenses
And yes, I believe I (or the monkey) could do a better job, but I’m not in the creativity business – THEY ARE.
BTW – I think District 9 is one of the best sci-fi/action movies I’ve ever seen and it was done on a (relative) shoe-string budget with good storyline, directing, acting and pretty decent special effects.
So my comment above -
“..$20 million for actors unless we use South African unknowns, then $2 million”
was meant as a COMPLIMENT for what great acting you can get from “unknowns” as long as you give them a creative story to work with.
Am I the only one who liked this trailer/movie?
I guess I tend to like survival movies about earthquakes, volcanoes, and stuff like this.
I know it was pretty cheesy, but still. Was it really *that* bad? o.O
As bubblegum for the brain, absolutely not!
There have been worse movies. Grow up.
The utter gall of the FX made me laugh out loud. I thought it was hilarious. Of course this would piss me off if I didn’t willingly suspend my disbelief. That’s the point, is it not?
I smell oscarrrr!
you and oscarrrr must be pretty close.
not if oscarrrr smells bad enough.
What are you Americans wingeing about? This is great bit of fun sci-fi. It will obviously come true one day. Loved the doughnut joke and the irony (remember irony) of Swartzenegger telling us it was all over. Fantastic!
Suspension of disbelief is fine in a fictional work, but if you go too far, it turns the whole thing into a comedy, not a drama, as intended. That’s what the “wingeing” (sic) is about. It’s embarassing to even think someone might consider you stupid enough to take it at face value at all.
I can answer one of the questions in the original post: if you try to pull a plane up when you haven’t reached take-off speed, absolutely nothing will happen. Best case, you take some pressure off the wheels which helps you reach take-off speed quicker, but that’s a real good way to run out of runway. This is an immutable law of aerodynamics; no matter how desperate you are, you ain’t going fast enough, you ain’t taking off. Some movies get this right – remember those scenes where the runway stops and the plane goes off the edge of a cliff? What happens? It *falls* until the falling gets it fast enough to produce lift, then it can pull up.
Furthermore, with the ground collapsing like that beneath the plane, it would have simply been sucked into the hole, end of movie. Heck, you can feel the difference in the air when flying a plane that size just getting above the level where the trees break the wind; you hit a warm pocket of air, the plane jerks upwards, a cold one, down you drop. You don’t notice these things in an airliner because they are so big and there is a combination of its mass making the responses more sluggish, and you just not noticing. But without any doubt, that much displaced air being pulled down would suck a plane that size right in. Matter of fact, an airliner would probably get sucked in by a catastrophe of that magnitude.
Seriously? you take on 2012 for insane driving skills and lack coordinated flight path? When there are blockbusters after blockbusters like Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter? Where is the realism of them? This is Hollywood for you…
umm.. besides the fact that lotr and the harry potter movies take place in alternate realities and THIS movie supposedly takes place in our world in 2012 ?.
Okay, call me a special effects junky, but I love the trailer. I like well plotted, well acted movies. But I also like completely over the top, stupidly insane big budget special effects showcases, as well. From the trailer, this might be the next raise of the bar in this genre, and I am certainly hoping so. My wife accuses me of only liking movies where an enormous number of things get blown up and a huge number of people die in the most terrible, pointless ways imaginable. 2012 might set records for both categories.
I like the way the actors give running narrations to the audience, so you know what’s going on: “We’ve got to get to the other side of the freeway!” They might as well just get Samuel L. Jackson to narrate the proceedings.
And yes- why do American wives always speak so condescendingly to their husbands? is this how it is in real life, or just Hollywood’s way of being PC (it’s not ok for men to talk down to women, but the converse is fine)?
Oh you guys are a bunch of picky nerds.
I don’t think the thang (sic) was even intended to be a drama or to have anything to do with ’suspension of disbelief’ it’s just entertainment DaveH.
Wait. You seriously don’t know who John Cusack is?
Not until I saw this trailer, no. I’ve heard the name, sure, but I wouldn’t have been able to pick him out of a lineup or anything like that.
i duno, i just like to see stuff go down.
so for that matter, the movie’s gonna be off the wall!
Does this mean the world is going to end before I get my Apple Tablet?
I love disaster movies- and I go into them with the assumption that there is no plot. This is like saying you see Transformers for the story. Any hardcore Transformers fan just wants to see giant robots duking it out and doesn’t give a darn about the story. I think this movie is going to be fantastic.
The movie trailer is one of the few I ever seen that make’s me hate it…RIGHT NOW!!!. It has the logic of an atari 2600 game.
LMAO… The movie is based on the world being destroyed on Dec. 2012…the preview shows explosions crazy stunts…a limo passing through a building…an plane taking off too quick… and people complains it’s gonna be crap. What was it suppose to show?? “Flying monkeys” ?? I think it’s gonna be pretty good. The whole “2012″ concept doesn’t have to be proven for the movie to be great. One thing’s for sure it will make its mark when it comes to $$$…
OK everyone, how about not giving Roland Emmerich your $11 this Friday?
If only this “creative genius” producer (and I use the term sarcastically) would just get caught up in one of his own disasters and get crushed by the Vatican.
Unfortunately Roland, your own death will be a whimper, alone and irrelevant. Too scared to show Muslim holy sites destroyed? OMG, what a pussy(cat)..